Fair-weather Friends

It took me a while to decide if I was going to write this post.  I never want to be interpreted as being negative.  People who REALLY know me, know that anything I say or do is coming from a genuine place.  I don't know everything and I'm certainly not perfect.  But this blog is here for me to express myself, to give the reader an understanding of me, my feelings, how I plan to deal with those feelings,  move on and with hopes to help someone get through a similar situation, of course, POSITIVELY. 

For the majority of my life I've had to deal with others insecurities, i.e. WOMEN.  If things are going good for me, they're mad. If my outfit is cute, they're mad. If I'm with someone they like, they're mad. If someone gives me a compliment, they're mad.  They just mad mad mad.  And frankly, I'm done with being the reason for them not being completely satisfied with the person GOD made them to be.  But of course they're issue is deeper than me.

Everything given to me, whether its my looks, my talent, my family and even my friends are from GOD. So frankly, if you mad at me, you're mad at GOD.  Whats more important, you can't take away anything GOD has planned, lined up, or has in the works for me.  So please stop the MAD-ness!  Really, at this point in life GROW UP!  Aren't you tired of trying to win against me. I am in no competition or race.  I am a child of GOD and when you go up against his children, YOU WILL NEVER WIN!!! So please get with the program.

I had to straight check a friend two weekends ago.  She is always calling me about her drama, and I listen. I give her advice, lift her up and give her my support.  But this chick fails to support me. Everytime I ask her for a favor...I mean everytime yall...not that she's never done anything for me, but I can probably count on one hand and we've been friends for quite some time.  And its small stuff. Stuff I'm willing to even give her money to do.  But she always got 100 reasons as to why she can't.  And I have had enough.  So in letting her know how I feel, she made a comment that was a wake up call.  She told me to "get over myself!" HUH? Cause I ask you do me a favor but everytime I ask you, you can't can't can't.  And I need to get over myself??

Wait I'm the same chick that holds you down, invites you to hang out, gives you clothes, listens to your drama, shares my family and friends, and of course checks you when you need to be  (cause that's what friends do) and I need to get over myself? Wow, where did that even come from? Obviously somewhere deeper than the favor I asked of you. I barely see you, but when I come in town, you can't find a minute to spend some time with me? I ask you to do a small favor and you cant cause you gotta do something for your co-worker that you've known 5 minutes and it's only gonna take you 5 minutes to do this favor for me?  So seems to me this "friend" needs to get over herself and the 100 excuses she's got in her hat as to why she can never help a sista out!

I'll do anything for my real sister.  And I consider my genuine friends my sisters.  And I look out as much as I can when I can for my girls.  No questions asked.  Now I can't say I've always been so easy to give of myself in the past, but that's the past.  The heart has always been there, it just may have come with a little extra. But I've grown up and am consistently working on me.  And when I need to be checked, I'm sure my girls handle it. 

So in going through this experience with her I've decided that she is just a person I can't depend on.  Point blank. And you know what I'm so cool with that because I do have friends I can depend on.  Who love me GENUINELY. Ain't hanging with me for no ulterior motives, keeping their enemy close or because its the GODLY thing to do.  KEEP IT REAL. If you don't like me. STEP! Don't waste my time because I don't need the negative energy, the deceptiveness or the lack of support.

And with all that I still LOVE you ... from a distance that is.  I am DONE  fighting to just be ME.  Why I got to not be me around you because you're insecure. I am DONE yall.  And I've talked to GOD and you know what? It's alright.  Because HE is the one showing me these so-called "friends" TRUE colors ... REVEALING THE FRAUDS.  And when HE does... It's time for you to go!!!  You're TIME IS UP sista, brotha..whoever!!!

We have had our season.  Thanks for being a part of a lesson I needed to learn about me and about friends in general.  I'm am done  sticking in there for people and they ain't sticking in or up for me.  I am not mad, I'm am not angry, I am just done. And I say that with a smile, a laugh even.    They'll find something. *side eye*

So Until Next Time ... Don't stress over those trying to cause stress in your life.  Pray for them as GOD is the only one that can help them through.  They have to first realize that they have an issue.  And maybe you can restore the friendship but you can't help those who aren't trying to help themselves.  We deserve friends who are down for us no matter what. Who want to see us prosper and succeed.  Who are just as happy for us as if it were their happiness because when good things happen to us, they happen for them.

As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance (approval or favor, encouragement, moral support) of his friend. Proverbs 27:17(NKJV)