Learning To Endure

The past month and half has been busy because auditions and castings have picked up tremendously for me. It has been a slow challenging year to say the least. In October I auditioned every week, about 2-3 times a week. Awesome sauce!  What is even more exciting for most of those appointments I was put on hold (being highly considered or top choice). I was on hold for six jobs in one week. I hadn't been on hold for that many jobs, at one time, in years. One year I was on hold for seven jobs and I booked four out of the seven. So surely, this time, I would have the same success, right? I'm much further along in my career ... a seasoned vet!  After a long drought the bookings are about to come on through.

Ummmmm NOPE! I booked one job. Now, don't get me wrong, I am thankful BUT a couple of those jobs were real healthy on the rate. But no dice. I was disappointed but not to the extent of tears. I just said ok GOD, you've got this. Something bigger is in store, I just gotta wait on it. In the meantime, I just need to prepare for what's to come.  After the six holds and five releases, I got two more holds. Ok for sure, I'm gonna book something. Nope! Released! Again! Both jobs. All I could do is smile because surely something amazing is around the corner. I know this in my heart and spirit.

What I have learned this year, honestly,  in the last month and a half, is how to endure the disappointments. I would state before that it doesn't get easier not booking the job, no matter how long you've been in the business. But I have to say in my present moment I beg to differ. What I know for sure is that GOD is in control. He has already proven that I am meant to be in this industry by the success I have already had, the tons of people who come up to me and say I inspire them, the eight recent holds and the constant reminder, encouragement, love and support I get from my friends and family.  I'm meant to be here and I am talented enough to be here. A release, hell, a booking doesn't 100% confirm that. There have been plenty of people not so talented or not even serious about being in this industry, get the job. I have to know despite who the client chooses for the job that that has nothing to do with me because I showed up, did my job and the rest is out of my control. Auditioning is preparation ... whether its in the casting room or in your living room.

But learning to completely rely on God has taught me the job doesn't give me provision but HE does. We too often times make our lives so much harder than it has to be. All God wants for us is to surrender to HIM so that He can show us how amazing and faithful He is. Surrendering doesn't mean giving up on your passion or dream but trusting in the gift GOD has given you and doing the work to prepare for the blessing God has in store for you ... which is usually bigger than we could even wrap our heads around. Doesn't that you get you excited for whats to come?

It may even come in a different form of what or how we perceive but it doesn't matter because we are  prepared to receive IT, whatever IT is. GOD is something else.

So if you are in a place of giving up and quitting. DON'T! Maybe you need clarity about where you are right now. Am I good enough? Am I too old? Why did I set out to do this? Why am I constantly up for the job but am not hired? ASK GOD the questions you want to know so that you are not receiving the wrong message from outside influences. You are good enough. You are successful. You are talented and meant to be right where you are. Be present in that moment. Accept it and move forward in it. I promise you what GOD will reveal will take you to another level in every level of your life.

Until Next Time: Pray, Prepare and God will Present.

Colossians 1:9-12 ... Continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives, so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way; bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience and giving joyful thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of his holy people in the kingdom of light.