Too Much Advice?

This may be a continuous pain in the butt throughout your life.  Whether it hits you personally or to someone you know. Dealing with people who have no respect for you, who are unhappy about the things happening for you and will do everything in their power to make sure your life is as uncomfortable, sad and negative as their own.  These are wealthy people, beautiful people, people who may have some really good things happening in their lives but all the good that is happening for you is the bane of their existence.

This is a person who has even helped you in a time of need, let you cry on their shoulder, maybe even helped you out financially. But even with all they have done for you, and lets just add you've done some really awesome, from the heart, because you love this person things for them as well, does not constitute them treating you like crap. NOTE: This is abuse.

Of course throughout the years you grow to the love this person but while you are steady growing they are steady on some other sh*t! Excuse my language.  But it really is more effective.  What do you do? When do you say enough is enough.  When do you say, hey I love you, but I love me more and this just ain't working out.

A friend of mine called me last night about a friendship that has been offering her nothing but disappointment on a sliver platter.  So me being a seasoned veteran in this area...LOL... no but its really not funny, I was there to hear her out and try to give her some sound advice.

While offering my advice, and this happens often, I revert back to a situation that happened to me.  In doing this, am I re-living the situation? Am I still hurt about it? Must I always use those situations as examples to get my point across? I mean I've managed to keep my head above the crap and have been able to move passed it ... I think?

Whatever it is, after I've finished the conversation, I always feel like now why did I bring that back up? Like, was it necessary?  My advice should be based on how I rose above it right?   Maybe in all my advice giving, I never really figured out after you decide to move past the relationship,  how do you move past what the person did?  Is that even possible? You may forgive but you never forget.  Maybe I'm over-reacting. Maybe its just an honest effort to help the person understand why I had to make the decision to not be friends with this person any longer.  People do some F'd up stuff man! NO I'M NOT PERFECT.  But some stuff you should never do.  I'm just saying. I digress.  

Maybe talking about it is a part of my healing process.  I don't know.  But it'd sure be awesome to be able to just zap all the bull crap that ever happened to you from your memory right?  But then how would we be able to help others?  Everyday all of us are going through situations to strengthen us, to help us grow and to help someone else. But does it mean they have to know every detail about how you got there? Geesh, I got 99 questions and a answer for none. LOL.

Well what I will work on is focusing on what it is the other person needs and not what I think I need to promote for them to understand why they should ultimately, make the decision that is best for them.  Now suppose they ask you what happened? Well, really all they need to know is that hey, that person did some things that were not cool, very unfriendly and I had tomake the clear decision to start a new chapter ... without them.   You will always remember what they did, and it may take some time to let that part go of deciding to forgive them, but over time, it will become less of a detailed chapter in your life.

Until Next Time ... Remember not everybody deserves the luxury of your friendship.